Why everyone in Australia dresses the same — and how to find your own style

Two ways to dress badly

MJ: There are two types of people. One is the casual gym thing — I could not understand it when I came to Australia. And the second is very glamorous, where everyone looks the same.

Bhav: Sydney and Australia in general is very trendy. Everyone dresses the same together, or they just put no effort in. So it is those two things. Either everyone looks the same, or they look like someone else entirely.

MJ: Why do you think people are scared to look different?

Bhav: Because they do not want to be the one that stands out. For a guy, they might get called something if they try wearing more colour. That is why a lot of men wear navy or black or white — very basic colours.

Dopamine dressing

Colour makes you feel happy. There is a term for it — dopamine dressing. And I believe in it one hundred per cent.

MJ: If you feel a bit low — and we all have those days — why not put some effort into yourself? I am not the kind of person who says I am saving this for a special occasion. Every day is a special occasion.

Bhav: Every day is a celebration. We are here, we are alive, we have a roof above our head. We should always dress nicely. And no one really does, except for a wedding or something.

How style actually develops

Bhav: Style is always evolving, because the person you were five years ago should dress differently to now. You are a different person. If you are always wearing the same thing every day, your style will never evolve.

He is direct about the early stage: it was bad. Trying things that did not work is how you learn what does.

Why thrift stores teach you more

Bhav: When you walk into a thrift store, everything is vintage — from the past. So you really have to think about how this is going to pair with your wardrobe.

Bhav: When you walk into somewhere very trendy, everything is already trendy. You can pretty much wear all of it together. So it is not building that styling skill in you. It is not building that mixing and matching skill.

Bhav: Mixing and matching is one of the most important skills you can have. How does this work with my wardrobe? With the shoes I have? With a coat I already own? — instead of just buying what is trendy.

The problem with trends

Bhav: Buying trends is okay, but you have to pick the trends that suit you as a person. Most people get too trapped in trends and it does not represent them any more. They want to look like a celebrity or a musician they like, and then they become too much like that artist — but they are not representing themselves any more.

Style is personal to you. You should express who you are, not who someone else is.

He gives leopard print as the current example: everywhere on TikTok, looks excellent on the model, and frequently does not suit the person who bought it.

Why to buy in store

Bhav: Always try things in store first, especially things you have not tried before.

Two reasons, and the second is the one people miss.

Bhav: You can feel the fabric. A lot of companies these days are using very bad quality fabric. It might look good in the photo because they are using amazing lighting, an amazing camera, an amazing model — but after two or three washes you cannot wear it again.

Bhav: Online is very impulsive. You see an ad, you want that dopamine fix, you buy it quickly. Then it arrives and it might not fit, or might not suit you.

He also notes you do not have to buy anything. Walking into a store, trying things on, and leaving is a legitimate way to learn what works.

Logos, status and understated elegance

MJ: I believe clothing should never wear you. You should wear the clothes.

Bhav: Luxury brands know the psychology. They know people want to show status. That is why the best-selling pieces are the very big logo ones. And I do not think that is what fashion is. Fashion is how you mix and match different things into something unique to you.

MJ: If you remove that shirt that cost you seven hundred or a thousand dollars — who are you? You should be able to express yourself and your confidence without it.

Bhav: Most people do not really understand that fashion is more about understated elegance than showing off. It has become a vanity thing, and I do not think it is that. It is about confidence, about self-expression, about being the best version of yourself every day.

Whose opinion to take

Bhav: When you try something different, most people are going to compliment you. Some will say bad things. If they say it in a way that is constructive, that is good — you can always improve.

MJ: But listen to the people worth listening to.

Bhav: If someone is well dressed and gives you an opinion, obviously listen. If someone looks the same as everyone else and is not putting any effort in, their opinion matters less — but it is still an opinion, and everyone has a different perspective. You can always learn from someone.

Eight years of showing up

Bhav describes starting from what he calls rock bottom — shy, introverted, socially anxious, bullied through school, with no friends. He began researching self-improvement, and the same advice kept appearing: get a good haircut, groom properly, dress well.

Bhav: I started an Instagram in 2017 and started posting my outfits. That is eight years of documenting my style. If I had not started that, who knows — I would probably still be dressing the same as back then.

He is also honest that visibility has a cost. He still gets abuse, including racist abuse, and his answer is that people who did not take their own risks tend to have the most to say about people who did.

You have to be yourself and be authentic to yourself. When you're authentic, people who are unhappy with their own lives — who didn't take the risk themselves — all they can do is hate on you.

On getting through the low point

MJ: What advice would you give someone who feels scared, or feels like a failure?

Bhav: When I was at rock bottom, when I had no friends, I did not think life would get better at all. I went through a period where I did not want to be here. I am glad I got through it, and I am lucky to be here today.

Bhav: I know how hard it is when you are so low that you cannot get up. It is hard to shower. You do not want to leave the house. I have been in that position. But keep going every day. Be consistent. Have one long-term goal you are working towards, and that purpose will keep you going.

Bhav: Life does get better. I promise you, because I am living proof of it. You will not be at rock bottom forever.

MJ: The circumstances you are in right now are not forever. Sometimes nobody believes in you, and you have to believe in yourself.